I love when our family gets together.  We know how to have fun.  Good-natured ribbing and hearty eating often go together.  There is a sense of anticipation and joy that comes in those situations.

                That’s how I like my church as well.  It’s good to have people greet me and make me feel welcome.  It’s nice to sit down and discuss the future with great anticipation.  To be part of a team of people who are working together to achieve God’s holy purposes is wonderful.  To feel like brothers and sisters in the faith is a wonderful feeling.

                What disrupts this ideal family setting can be one person who comes with an attitude.   They might be upset at what one family member did, so they come, but they are upset.  They may have called around to other family members to let them know why they are so ticked off!  The tension at that family gathering can be cut with a knife.

                Or sometimes the person doesn’t show up.  They just decide that they are not wanted or they don’t want to be with other family members, so they don’t show up.  Their absence is noticed by all.  Everyone has an opinion as to why their brother didn’t show up.  Though they are absent physically, their presence is all around.  And it takes away from the joy of the family gathering.

                Some of you have experienced similar situations.  In-laws butted their noses into your marriage and upset the warm relationship between you and your spouse. 

                You had a good job and everyone got along good.  But someone became disgruntled and the atmosphere in the office went south quickly.

                Your friends at school got along real well until someone came and turned half your friends against you.

                You used to talk to a friend all the time on the telephone.  But someone got to them and now they hardly spend the time of day with you.

                When that happens, whether it is family, job or community, something takes place that is common to all.  We hurt.

                There are varying degrees of hurt.  Sometimes we are just devastated.  Other times just annoyed.  But we are hurt.

                By the way, people make millions on this hurt.  Why do so many of the tabloids sell?  Because they portray famous people dealing with problems we have.  This star broke up the marriage of these two other people.  An aggressive agent turned on the stage personality and tried to ruin his career.  We eat this stuff up because we know what it is like to be hurt by others.

                This is not unusual.  Solomon knew about dissension between people and gives us a clear statement:  God hates a man who stirs up dissension among brothers.  That is Proverbs 6:19.

                I am not sure, but I thought that may be Solomon, as king, thought about some of the tribal wars that took place in Israel.  When Israel came into being, each of the tribes got a parcel of land.  But each tribe represented one of Jacob’s sons with Manassah and Ephriam taking Joseph’s spot.  So dissension among brothers might have been trouble in the nation.  It seemed that the northern ten tribes always had a feud with Benjamin and Judah, the southern two tribes.

                If so, then what God hated were people who were pushing for the separation of Israel and trying to create civil war. 

                In his father’s family this had happened as well with his step-brother. Absolom tried to take over his father’s throne and worked hard to get the people in Jerusalem to follow him, rather than his father, David.  This created great turmoil in Israel.  In our own country we are still dealing with the aftershocks of the Civil War.  

                God hates the person who tries to cause friction between brothers.

                How can this happen?  This trait is the last in a list of seven.  All of the six above can contribute to dissension among brothers. “17 haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, 18 a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, 19 a false witness who pours out lies and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers.” Proverbs 6:17-19, NIV.

                When we move from government, as Solomon may have referred to, into the church, we find that dissension is also a problem for God.

                God’s will for us is expressed in Ephesians “9 And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, 10 to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment--to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ.”  Ephesians 1:9, 10, NIV.  

                Do you think that it is in God’s perfect will to have so many denominations or so many independent churches around?  I don’t think so.  It appears to me from the New Testament that all the Christian churches in one city were unified and worked together.  And all of them felt kinship and a tie to other churches and Christians.  This is not some kind of ecumenicalism; it was a basic sense of brotherhood and unity between the churches.  And if someone came in to destroy that unity by turning people against one another, God hated that.

                In 1 Corinthians Paul speaks about people who follow Paul, Peter or Apollos.  He called them carnal.  God never wanted us to pledge allegiance to men, but to see that he uses different men in different ways to bring people to the one God and His Son, Jesus Christ.  Paul said that one plants, another waters, but God gives the increase.  Praise God for the increase, men are only his servants.  

                The real issue for many is the question, “Am I stirring up dissension or am I just expressing a differing viewpoint?  Am I the cause of division if I don’t agree?”

                 The answer for that question is based on an understanding of love.  Love is patient, kind.  In other words, love deals with how we do what we do, not with what we do.  I can be right in what I say, but be wrong in how I say it.  I can do the right thing, but be wrong in how I do it.

                I would think that disagreement among Christians would be a dialogue of two humble people.  Both parties would be seeking the will of God.  There might be insights or background or issues that the one who questions the status quo might not be aware of.  There might be blind spots on the part of the one who is receiving the criticism that need to be pointed out.  But Galatians says that we are to do so in a gentle spirit.  It’s ok to disagree, but it’s not ok to be disagreeable.  Submission to God on the part of both parties would be essential.

                Along with that would be a desire on the part of both to find a solution.  Disagreement that just points out problems without a willingness to be part of the solution puts the person who disagrees in a tough spot.  That was the problem the Pharisees had.  “I thank God I am not like the other sinners!”   That is criticism with no humility and no desire to help the poor sinner who needs to change.

                We could go on here, but I think you get the point.  Disagreement among two brothers or sisters who love each other in the Lord can produce spiritual growth. This kind of talk builds unity and bridges between two people.  But dissension is when people take sides and build walls.

                So what we really need to do in our lives is ask ourselves how to build unity.  Here are some thoughts.

                Ephesians 4 tells us that unity comes when we respond to our spiritual leaders.  As we study the Word together we are brought together in unity of the faith.  Skipping church, Sunday school, training meetings can all be ways to thwart God-given attempts at unity.

                Unity comes when we all submit to one head, Jesus Christ.  We cannot have unity if we are unwilling to submit to Jesus.  If you take the attitude, “I don’t care what the Bible says, I am going to do what I want to do...” you may fall and take others with you.

                Unity comes when we share things in common.  When we eat together, work together, learn together, we build bonds that help keep us together.  We all share Jesus if we are Christians.  When we are not involved in ministry, when we are not committed to getting to know and work together with the body of Christ, that is when we can become potential leaders of dissension.

                Unity comes when we share disagreements in the spirit of love and mutual edification.  Things kept in can blow up.  Ephesians 4 also tells us that Satan enters our lives through the door of our anger. 

                We live in an imperfect world.  Sometimes our best efforts will be to no avail.  That is why Paul said, “As much as it lies within us, live at peace with all men.”